Lesson 18

What To Consider Before

Considering Marriage

I Corinthians 7:25-40

I Corinthians 7 was Paul's answer to the Corinthians' questions about marriage and family matters. We have come to the last section of this chapter - vs. 25-40. You probably haven't heard a lot of teaching and preaching from this passage - it is often overlooked perhaps because it is somewhat difficult to understand.

In my mind, this is an important passage for those who are considering marriage to consider. You should go into marriage with your eyes open - fully prepared. In these sixteen verses, Paul says that there are four things to consider before considering marriage.

What Paul has to say in this passage is not based on any commandment from the lips of our Lord while He was here but it is the judgment of Paul, a faith follower of Christ (v. 25). In fact, Paul ends the passage by reminding his readers that he is an inspired writer who "(has) the Spirit of God", v. 40.

Consider Your Circumstances, 7:25-31.

Paul lived during a time and himself experienced firsthand persecution. It wasn't strange for Christians to be beaten, imprisoned and tortured for their faith. This is probably the "present distress" to which he refers to, v. 26. Persecution doesn't mix well with family obligations. Thus, Paul recommends remaining single for practical reasons. We need to consider the times.

Only fairy tales end with the couple living "happily ever after". In the real world there are trials and troubles. You will have "trouble in the flesh" (v. 28). In fact, Paul expected that the situation could get so difficult that those who are married may have to live as though they were not married (vs. 29-31a) meaning that husbands and wives may be separated due to economic factors or persecution.

Things in this world are always changing. Verse 31 says that "the fashion of the world passeth away". It certainly isn't a sin to marry (v. 28) but those who are considering need to first consider their circumstances.

Consider Your Responsibilities, 7:32-35.

The emphasis on this paragraph is on the word "care", which means "to be anxious or to be pulled in different directions. It is impossible for two people to live together without burdens of one kind or another, but there is no need to rush into marriage and create more problems. Marriage requires a measure of maturity.

Once again, Paul emphasizes living for the Lord. The advantage of remaining single is that you can put all your energy into serving the Lord. You can be "without distraction" (v. 35). While it is possible to please both the Lord and your partner, it requires spiritual maturity and effort.

Consider Your Situation Uniquely, 7:36-38

Paul addresses here the fathers of unmarried girls. In that day, it was the parents who arranged the marriages, particularly the fathers. Paul makes it clear that he is not laying down an iron clad rule for everyone to follow. Here, he makes it clear that the father had a freedom of choice whether or not he would give his daughter in marriage.

What the commentators say about this passage is that apparently some Corinthian fathers had vowed when their daughters were young to keep them permanent virgins. Now, the girls were coming of marrying age and were wanting to marry. Paul is saying that the father is free to change his mind.

So far as I know, the arranged marriage of Bible times was not commanded only custom. Our custom is that marriage partners are found through courtship. However, it is a wise thing for young people to seek the counsel of godly parents in finding a partner.

Paul hits on a key problem in verse 36 when he mentions those who "pass the flower of (their) age". Some become one of those unclaimed blessings in the church. The danger, of course, is to be so desperate to be married that you make an unwise choice for a life partner. When I was in college, we called the senior scare. Seniors were scared that they were going to graduate from college without someone and became desperate for marriage.

Each situation is unique, and parents and children must seek the Lord's will. It takes more than two Christian people to make a happy marriage. It takes responsibility. Not every marriage that is scriptural is necessarily sensible.